Ep 111 - The Open Sandwich Generation

You've heard of the sandwich generation — pressed between ageing parents above and growing children below, doing all the lifting.

But nobody's named what happens next.

When your parents have died. When your children have properly left home. When, for the first time since you were eighteen, you are not the support layer for anyone but yourself.

You're an open sandwich. And it is a stranger, lighter, and more disorienting phase of life than anyone tells you.

In this episode, Dan explores the freedom of the open sandwich generation — the giddy Wednesday afternoons on the coast, the guilty lightness of nobody needing you — alongside the quieter beats nobody warns you about: the grief that becomes weather, the strange new promotion to senior generation, and the moment you look around and realise you've quietly become the row at the front.

But the open sandwich is also a test. Freedom without structure isn't liberation — it's a vacuum. And the retirees who thrive at this stage don't feel only the lightness. They learn to hold both, on the same plate, on a Sunday morning, without flinching.

This is the episode that might make you look at the next decade of your life differently.

WHAT YOU'LL TAKE FROM THIS EPISODE

— Why the open sandwich generation is a distinct phase of life that deserves a name of its own
— The lightness that feels almost rude, and why you're allowed to enjoy it
— The grief that doesn't end — it just becomes the weather
— The strange new "promotion" to senior generation, and the moment you notice it
— Why freedom without structure is a vacuum, not a reward
— Three thoughts on how to compose the plate of your open sandwich decade
— Why the retirees who thrive learn to hold lightness and grief on the same plate

CHAPTERS

00:00 — The Sunday morning that feels almost rude
00:50 — Welcome to Humans vs Retirement
01:30 — The sandwich we all know, and what comes after
04:00 — The lightness that surprises you
07:00 — The grief that becomes weather
10:00 — The new row at the front
12:00 — The test inside the freedom
14:00 — Three thoughts, not five moves
17:00 — The composed plate
19:00 — Outro

THE LINE TO REMEMBER

"The lightness and the grief are not opposites. They share the plate."

LINKS AND RESOURCES

Read Dan's essay on the same theme on Substack: https://humansvsretirement.substack.com

Subscribe to The Retirement Fix newsletter: https://humansvsretirement.com

Connect with Dan on LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/danhaylett

Dan's book, The Retirement You Didn't See Coming, is available on Amazon.

IF THIS EPISODE LANDED FOR YOU

Share it with someone who's living in the open sandwich right now — a friend, a sibling, a colleague who's just watched their last child move out or their last parent go. That's how this work spreads.

And if you've got thirty seconds, leaving a rating or review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify makes a genuine difference to who finds the show next.

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This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It does not constitute regulated financial advice or a personal recommendation. Dan Haylett is a financial planner regulated by the FCA, but views expressed are his own.